Be bold and be condemned.
I quote Diliman Republic from this page http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150143472589750&set=a.234946049749.166689.198180324749&ref=nf
Pero kids, ganyan lang talaga mga taga-UP, pagnag-samasama na sila-sila lang, naku yabangan at panlalait galore. Pero pag may kasama ng iba, quiet na yan. Wala kang makikitang UP na nagyayabang pag may ibang tao na.
In my case, totoo ang statement na ito. Kapag may family gatherings kasi kami, hindi ako umiimik sa tuwing ikinukwento ng mga pinsan kong non-UP graduates ang mga paghihirap nila noong sila ay estudyante pa. Ganito rin kapag may get-together ang tropa; tahimik lang ako kapag universities na ang usapan, lalo pa at ako lang sa amin ang sa UP nag-aaral. Pero bakit nga ba natatameme ako? Unang-una, naglalaho sa utak ko ang cliche na UP and Others dahil kahit hindi sila taga-UP, mataas ang tingin ko sa kanila. Para anupa’t naging pinsan nila ako at kaibigan kung mababa lang din naman ang tingin ko sa kanila. Ikalawa, mahal ko sila kaya ayaw ko silang mapahiya. May maisasagot ba sila kapag ako na nabuhay sa kupalan at yabangan ang nagsalita? Ikatlo, ayaw kong ipagmalaki ang aking kagalingan dulot ng pag-aaral sa unibersidad kung hindi pa naman ako nakakakuha ng diploma mula rito. Ayaw kong maging ipokrita dahil sa pagyayabang sa labas habang hirap naman sa pagpasa sa loob.
Sa ngayon ay ito ang aking mga dahilan. Ang tanong, hanggang kailan ako mananahimik?
I quote 2 Corinthians 3:2-3
You yourselves are the letter we have, written on our hearts for everyone to know and read. It is clear that Christ himself wrote this letter and sent it by us. It is written, not with ink but with the Spirit of the living God, and not on stone tablets but on human hearts.
Please spend some time daily talking to God, be it by letter, silent time or the usual prayer. Believe and you will be amazed how God responds to our prayers.
A job fair was conducted at the university today. I passed my resume to San Miguel Brewery and had an informal interview with the Human Resource representative. I was not able to give even one good answer. T.T I did not know what to say; no good answer came to my mind. Good thing the HR representative was nice; though I talked nonsense, I managed to stay cool. It was such a shameful experience (seven hours have passed but I can still feel the shame). I couldn’t handle the embarrassment so I went out of the hall few minutes after the mock interview.
Then, I treated myself with spaghetti meat ball and caramel frappe to somehow lessen the heaviness of emotions that I bear. After almost two hours of chilling at the coffee shop, I went to BDO to deposit cash on someone’s (I can’t tell) account. I have been in the queue for more than 30 minutes and yet I still had a long way to go. If that someone did not need the money today, I would have left when I saw the queue. I spent almost two hours in that bank just to deposit 6 grand!
I was so tired and sleepy so I went home. The problem is, I CAN’T GET IN (my keys have been missing for more than a day now). My housemates weren’t there so I had to go somewhere else because I did not want to wait outside without knowing what time they would come. I spent one and a half hours in a coffee shop then decided to wait for them outside the apartmenr. It’s nearly 5pm so I thought it won’t be long before they get home. I was right. Ann came I think 30 minutes after I went back. And now here I am, narrating this very exciting, interesting and productive day. GAAAAHHHHH!
I am the so-called president of an organization. There will be a bid book competition (with categories Individual, Group, and Project) on March and I have decided not to join because I do not think that our chapter performed so well this year, we do not have a budget for the book and, we only had two projects this year (the others were merely participation on others’ activities). Three of my members contacted me and seemed to be interested in joining the competition. I asked them some things with regards to the org and the competition so that if they would give me good answers, I could consider joining. My questions weren’t answered. The catch is, our chapter has passed a pre-entry form. I knew what they were up to the moment my secretary did not respond to my message.
I said that this blog is about how life treats me and how I respond to it. But right now, I really do not know how to respond. I am angry. Bad things such as leaving our online group and blocking them on my account come to my mind. I imagine myself ignoring them on the street, ignoring their messages, cutting all the ropes that links me to them. I can do that but I do not want to leave my responsibilities and friends just because of them. However, I cannot be plastic either; that’s against my virtue. What to do? What to do?
What would Jesus do?
I went to the fair with my roommate and her friends. While having fun listening to a band, I did something that made her mad. Well I hit her on the head but I did not mean to hurt her. It’s just kind of joke but she said she’s hurt. It’ obvious that she’s mad and I ruined her mood. I know that it’s really my fault and I am very sorry for that that’s why I just kept quiet and did not bug her at all since then.
When the band finished playing, we walked home, still with her friends, but I kept my distance from her. I noticed that she does not even try to glance to see whether I am still there or not. I was alone walking behind them. It was really embarrassing because there were lots of people walking I was the only one who’s alone.
As I said, I know that it really is my fault; but I never knew that she would allow me to look like a trash, ever. NOW I KNOW. Though I did not have my keys with me, I walked faster and left them. It was REALLY EMBARRASSING. When I walked past a group of mean BA Communication Arts students, they sang Queen’s Alone. In addition to my embarrassment, when I walked past a group of guys, someone said, “Uy si Ate mag-isa.” I just had to walk faster to look as if I have a problem or something like that.
Now I do not know how to deal with her. I am planning to tell her that I admit doing bad thing but I never knew that she could do that to me. I do not know what its effect would be but I think that it will make me feel better.
Good thing we only have more than a month to stay in one room.
I never expected that we’ll be in such situation. 😦
Just came from the fair. I FEEL SO ALONE.
I used to have two solid circles of friends. They’re both gone now. I guess this is the curse of being extended and snob at the same time. ARGH.
FRIENDS. SOCIAL LIFE. Still have them. But nothing compares to the companies that I had.